“Who can find a virtuous woman? for her price is far above rubies.” Prov. 31:10.
“Let a young man seek one to stand by his side who is fitted to bear her share of life’s burdens, one whose influence will ennoble and refine him, and who will make him happy in her love.
He should earnestly pray for a woman that “will do him good and not evil all the days of her life” [Prov. 31:12], one who “worketh willingly with her hands.” Prov. 31:13.
If she can keep the house clean and neat and orderly; if she can proficiently cook, launder, and sew; if she can care for the sick and administer first aid; if she can intelligently care for children; if she can raise a thrifty garden to supply her table with plenty of fresh vegetables… if she can do all these, then she is worthy of the respect owing a good wife; she has acquired the cement of a strong, enduring union. Even so, though, respecting and respected as she must be, she also must have some trade or profession so that should the husband take sick or become disabled or be taken away she can head the home and care for its needs and meet its problems.
Here are things which should be considered: Will the one you marry bring happiness to your home? Is she an economist, or will she, if married, not only use all her own earnings, but all of yours to gratify a vanity, a love of appearance? Are her principles correct in this direction? Has she anything now to depend upon? I know that to the mind of a man infatuated with love and thoughts of marriage these questions will be brushed away as though they were of no consequence. But these things should be duly considered….
In addition, she “considereth a field, and buyeth it: with the fruit of her hands she planteth a vineyard. She girdeth her loins with strength, and strengtheneth her arms. She stretcheth out her hand to the poor; yea, she reacheth forth her hands to the needy. She maketh herself coverings of tapestry; her clothing is silk and purple. Strength and honour are her clothing; and she shall rejoice in time to come. She openeth her mouth with wisdom; and in her tongue is the law of kindness. Many daughters have done virtuously, but thou excellest them all. Favour is deceitful, and beauty is vain: but a woman that feareth the Lord, she shall be praised.” Prov. 31:16-17, 20, 22, 25, 26, 29-30.
Examine carefully to see if your married life would be happy or inharmonious and wretched. Let the questions be raised, will this union help me heavenward? Will it increase my love for God? And will it enlarge my sphere of usefulness in this life? If these reflections present no drawback, then in the fear of God move forward.
AH 45.5, Ans. Book 3:85, CCh 113.3, CCh 112.5